A Player Rained on My Amazing Mini Parade!

Congratulations on your win! I’m sure that it must have felt good to see your Mini picked!

I’m sorry that someone left that impolite and ill-informed comment in your Guestbook. You are correct that often times people have the same idea at the same time. I’ve been a Pogo Mini Judge and have seen it myself. The person who left the message should have at least had the decency to talk to you about it.

Now, some of you may recall my column from June about someone who did, in fact, steal someone’s Mini, so it does happen. But, that’s the exception, rather than the rule. As they say, “Great minds think alike.”

My advice for all Amazing Mini participants is to not take these events too seriously. The truth of the matter is that some people just don’t play well with others, and rather than see the situation for what it is (a coincidence) they automatically assume the worst.

Rather than “Approve” her comment, you might have had more peace of mind had you not approved it, and ignored her completely.

Now, someone out might be wagging their finger at the screen and saying “she should tell that person that she didn’t steal the Mini!” And while you certainly could do that, I actually don’t think you should waste your time and effort. Had this person privately messaged you and said “Hey, I notice your Mini is almost exactly the same as mine… was that a coincidence?”, then sure, reply with “Yes it was! Great minds think alike.”

However, this player was not at all polite and really didn’t deserve an answer.

And let’s get you back on the right track. Please pour yourself a hot cup of tea (or whatever drink you like), and allow me to toast to your spot in the Amazing Minis section! Congratulations! There was something special about your Mini and here’s to the recognition of it!

Thanks for bringing this to our attention. We do have “www.pogo” in our chat filter, so the vast majority of players do not actually see that part of the web address.

Without being able to see an actual message, I can’t be 100% sure, but my guess is that they’ve created a screen name to appear as part of the message and are employing the “emote” command by typing “/e” then their message in the chat box. For instance, if I create a screen name using a simple word… like “Salutations” and go into a chat room and type: “/e and Greetings! Go to www.picniccritters.com and get free ants for your picnic!” it will appear in chat like: “*Salutations and Greetings! Go to www.picniccritters.com and get free ants for your picnic!” You might not even see that the screen name is right there.

Now – again – I’m not sure this is exactly how it’s being done, but that is a simple trick people employ.

But you know what? Not knowing the screen name isn’t even necessary to file an Abuse Report. You can click on another person’s screen name to open up the Abuse Report form, and then click the “Add Players” button and choose “Not Listed”. That will remove the name you chose, and show “Not Listed” to our Customer Experience Representatives. From there, you can choose “SPAM/Advertising/Cheat Info” and send it forth. The Abuse Report will include a chunk of the chat from the room which will likely include the offending message – including the screen name of the offender. The quicker you can file the report, the better.

Most people have the common sense enough to know that these so-called “offers” are nothing more than tactics to gain information about one’s Pogo account. Unfortunately, there are those who do fall for these tricks, and alas, there’s little we can do to stop them. Hopefully, they get fooled once and quickly learn their lesson.

I do appreciate your predicament, I’ve contacted you privately to see if I can help further, and I fully recognize the inconvenience of changing one’s screen name. I only wish that keeping people off of Pogo were that simple. It’s not.

The fact of the matter is that the Internet allows anonymous ne’er-do-wells to cause problems for others, and no matter how many roadblocks and obstacles we might put up – there’s always a way around them. This is a common problem on social sites, and unfortunately in most cases the onus is on the innocent individual to deal with the issue.

There are exceptions – if the offender is breaking the law (making threats to harm you or your family, etc…), then you can contact your local authorities, explain the situation, and Pogo (and other sites) will work the law enforcement to help in any way possible.

So, your decision to keep your name is your choice and comes with consequences. If the people on your Friends List are the type of folks who would give your stalker your new name, then I would question whether or not you really want them as friends. Last week, I made recommendations that if followed should prevent the stalker from being able to find her – including having the letter-writer go through her Friends List and trim anyone who was not truly a friend.

I’ll state it again – if you start to feel like you are being stalked, identify the stalker and immediately start to ignore him or her. Be on guard, and be careful with whom you socialize as the stalker may be trying to warm up to you with a fake account. As I said – they want one thing – attention – if they get it, they will continue.

I should also mention that in cases where you’ve been engaging the stalker for some time and suddenly quit giving them any attention, be prepared for an onslaught of attention seeking. Generally, when they sense you’re not taking their bait anymore, they up the ante and employ new and diabolical methods to pull you back into their web. You must stand firm and not give in. As soon as you do, it strengthens their resolve and gets worse.

But, before you begin to believe that by changing your name, or not getting in the last word is some form of defeat – recognize the situation the stalker is in. This person is seriously spending a good deal of his or her limited time on earth doing nothing but trying to cause problems for others. What kind of life is that? Sure, maybe you had to change your name to avoid this person. But guess what? When you wake up in the morning and look in the mirror – you are still you and you get to enjoy your time here.

Many of us are familiar with the wonderful saying “God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.” This is exactly the type of situation where this applies. You can’t change the stalker’s behavior. Chances are you don’t even know who this person is. You *can* change how you deal with it.