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Dear Ms. Netiquette,
I have a friend on Pogo that I accepted a Friend Request from on Facebook. We don’t chat every often on Pogo or on Facebook.
The other night she sent me a Facebook message and asked me to purchase her a six month Pogo pass. I told her I couldn’t do that because, like her, I am on a limited income with two kids to feed.
She replied with “it’s for my birthday.” I told her I would be glad to send her a five day pass but that is all I could and would do.
She in turn said if I were a true friend I would do this. I want to be friends with her because we have a lot in common but I don’t want her to think that just because we are friends I’m going to purchase her time for Pogo when I have to scrape and save to purchase my own. Do you think I handled this right?
Blonde and Broke but not Dumb
| Dear Blonde and Broke, Well, I’m going to add an extra cube of sugar to my tea for this one. Unless you have a truly uncommon personality, or this person has a very unusual passion that you share, I’m not sure why you would want to hang on to a “friend” who would attempt to guilt you into giving you something you can’t afford. But, you didn’t ask me whether or not you should remain friends with her. You asked if you handled the situation correctly. And you did. You were honest with her, told her that you couldn’t afford to buy her a six month subscription, and even offered to provide her with a guest pass. You, my dear, were a friend to her. While she, too, may be struggling, she should have gracefully accepted your answer, gratefuly accepted your offer, and moved along. |
Dear Ms. Netiquette,
I’ve had an incident ongoing now since the beginning of the year from a tight group that accuses me of cheating in my favorite game Boardwalk Sea Ball. I DO NOT CHEAT at any game – I just try to better myself. Despite their ongoing torture and ruining my name in the game, I decided to employ the old term “turn the other cheek and be kind – it will drive them crazy”.
One day several months ago I said “Hi” to one of my accusers and she typed out a two-word response that began with the letter “F” and ended with the word “you”. I have never said anything to anyone this horrific and had no problem reporting her, as I feel it’s my duty to keep Pogo a nice place for all.
Well, I was very disappointed when this player made it a point to come in the room where I was and state: “Thank you for that little slap on the hand from Pogo. I know you were hoping they’d suspend me!”
To tell you the truth, I was very hurt that she wasn’t suspended… as she deserved it. Players that don’t respect and spew foul language need to show some respect. I was once sent a warning sitting at a Spades game when the guy had a double browser and was playing in another game playing I decided to type out “God loves you” over and over, hoping to hit a nerve. I was shocked he could sit there and cheat. Why does it seem Pogo doesn’t want to keep Pogo clean?
Thanks for your time,
Sincerely,
Sick of Double Standards
| Dear Sick of Double Standards, I’m sorry you had that upsetting experience. Unfortunately, in this life the infraction doesn’t always receive a just punishment. It’s likely that the person you reported had no prior complaints, and thus received only a warning. In the Spades case, your violation was screen scrolling. The Abuse Report does not have the ability to tell if someone is double browsing, so in the eyes of the representative who handled the Abuse Report, you were the one causing the problem. Pogo does want to keep it clean, but as players, we need to do our part. If we engage in questionable behavior in response to abuse, we’ve sullied ourselves right along with the abuser, and we risk the same fate that an abuser might. And it’s not always fair. In the real world a violent criminal may off scot free on a legal technicality, while an average Jo or Jolene ends up spending the night in jail for jaywalking because he forgot his ID. On Pogo, generally, if you are reported for a violation that’s clear in the Abuse Report, appropriate action is taken. |
Ms. Nettie,
I sure do appreciate that all your older articles are archived, but without a search function, it is a monumental task to try and find something you’ve said in the past.
There’s a discussion on the forums right now about whether or not doing other people’s badges is cheating. I believe you’ve addressed this in the past and I believe you agree with me that it’s cheating. Can you point me to that article or restate your position please?
Thanks,
Not Up For Task
| Dear Not Up For Task, To be honest, I’m not up for the task either! It’s just as time consuming for me to find it as for you, and frankly – it’s probably quicker for me to just respond to it. Plus, it probably bears repeating. Of course it’s cheating. How on earth could it not be? If Kobe Bryant showed up in place of Manu Ginobli and proceeded to win the game, would it be considered cheating? Yes, my friends, it would. Badges are earned to reflect YOUR accomplishments, not some other person you could find to do it for you. That said – is it a huge deal? No. Badges are collected for personal pleasure. Those who have earned all of them by themselves have these accomplishments and can be proud that they, themselves, earned them. So, those people who do have others do badges on their accounts are essentially misrepresenting themselves, but in the long run, they’ll know that the badges they have were not truly earned. |
Dear Readers,
As next week is Thanksgiving here in the US, there will be no Ms. Netiquette column. I wish you all a warm and wonderful holiday, and the column will resume on December 2.
Have a wonderful holiday!
Ms. Netiquette
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