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Dear Nettie,
I was playing Jigsaw Treasure Hunter when I replied to a question of “Does anyone like this game?” I said yes and a young lady promptly said she did too. I engaged her in a bit of general conversation concerning the game. She invited me to a private chat which I declined with the explanation that I do not do private chat unless I know someone personally.
She then told me how old she was and I’m afraid I got a little preachy. She replied that she did not mean to make me mad and I explained that I wasn’t angry, I was being protective of both of us (she was a 4th grader). I told her that generally Pogo was safe, however, she should be careful of whom she invited to private chat.
Was I wrong?
Grandmother in Colorado
| Dear Grandmother in Colorado, Were you wrong? Absolutely not. You didn’t go into exactly what you said that prompted your concern, so maybe you did get a little preachy and perhaps you could have said things in a better way. But you were in the moment and your motivation was clearly in the right place. Furthermore, you led by example. By explaining your reasons why you don’t accept Private Chats lets her know that it’s perfectly acceptable and not rude to politely decline an invitation of such. Pogo is, as you say, generally safe. But unfortunately there are predators out there, and while we strongly urge all parents to take the time to teach their children the basics of being online and to monitor and supervise how the computer is being used, sometimes unsupervised and uninformed children do find themselves on Pogo. While you may feel you went a little overboard, you absolutely did the right thing and I’m sure that she appreciated it. |
Dear Ms. Netiquette,
I was in a room where someone would remark on other people’s losses.
She would say “ss” if it was a split in bowling or a loss of an auction in Dice City Roller.
What I noticed is she never commented on other people’s wins. Like if they won the auction or didn’t get a split.
I find this rude and unsportsmanlike.
She should comment with a “gg” to whomever wins the game. Everyone does that. That is good sportsmanship.
I just find it rude to point out someone’s losses. Everyone knows when they lose. I think positive feedback is much more useful.
I was wondering what your opinion of this would be?
Thank you,
Positive Reinforcement Fan
| Dear Positive Reinforcement Fan, Well, I do agree that it’s much more polite to comment on one’s good news rather than their bad news, I’m not sure that the player you mention could be fairly labeled “rude”. She may just be very sympathetic to people’s losses, and not realize that by doing so she’s drawing more attention to the events others might rather not think about. My advice? If you find this irritating, then mute her. |
Dear Nettie,
I see that some people believe that all abusers get away with the violations (Ms. Netiquette, 1/21/2011). I can confirm that I know at least two people that have had their accounts cancelled for abuse issues. One of these people three times. Three different accounts. If they have come back again under another account, I believe they have learned their lessons. No more harassment of myself of my friends.
Thank you Pogo police, you truly did help.
And just a side note, the mute did not work. They came back under another name, but had written down all previous Pogo friends and found us again. The second time was the charm.
Keep up the good work all at Pogo.
Thankful Pogo Player
| Dear Thankful Pogo Player, Thanks so much for your letter. It’s nice to receive some feedback from someone who does recognize that Pogo does deal with abusive players. I did receive a lot of e-mail about my remarks regarding the mute function. To be clear – I encourage the use of mute whenever you see bad language or conversations that you don’t wish to see. If you see someone being abusive towards others, or to the room in general, then I encourage players to file an Abuse Report. For instance, if a player is playing Word Whomp and comes very close to winning a perfect game, but is one word short and lets loose an expletive in the chat, then I’d encourage you to mute that player, or let them know that you find their comments offensive, rather than reporting them for abuse. Technically, yes, it’s a violation of the Terms of Service, and yes, they should know better. However, they did not set out to cause harm to others and an occasional slip of the tongue doesn’t warrant the filing of an Abuse Report. The player may end up being disciplined harshly for a minor infraction, and our Customer Support people could be attending to more pressing issues. In any case where a player is going after another with the intent to upset someone, then please use the Report Abuse. Those people should be given the appropriate discipline for their attempt at disrupting the enjoyment of others. |
Have an etiquette question for Ms. Netiquette? Email msnetiquette@pogo.com
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